Tuesday, 18 May 2010

The nuts that ate the world!

I'm not 100% sure that testes are supposed to get that small but I swear that if they'd have shrunk any more then they'd have imploded and collapsed into some sort of weird black hole... I could have been the man who had the nuts that ate the world! Still, guess it was my own fault for buying a season ticket to the Cambridge Lido in a fit of enthusiasm for getting healthy. What with giving up smoking (except for the electronic kind and the odd crafty fag after tea while getting him-next-door over to watch a DVD (more of which later!)), starting to eat meat and no longer working nights things are definitely on the change!

Still, what with having a Mooring Licence, and thus access to a Leasure Card I thought it'd be a good idea to make use of the facilities, I just didn't reckon on the facilities being quite so cold - and the young chap on the entrance said it was warmer than usual as well! 13°C is not warm, I know it's not freezing, but it's not warm! It felt like I was getting attacked by a million nettles or something and my breath started getting harder and harder to bring down into my lungs and I was getting more and more tired and... being overtaken by the elderly! I only managed one and a half lengths and then had to get out for a shower and head to work.

We watched Legend of the Bog last night, except it wasn't called that... I loved the review by TwentyCamels, most especially this bit:

"The only saving grace to this joke is the on-the-floor-in-hysterics performance put in by whatever lunk they hired to play the bog man. He comes across like a supermarket trolley attendant lost in the woods on cheap speed, his facial expressions as he attempts to convey whatever the director told him to convey are priceless in their utter retardation, look out for a good bit at the end where the girl is squaring up to him, and for a minute he looks like he's building up to a really HUGE roar of fury, neck straining and everything, and then just suddenly looks confused, or constipated, a little embarrassed too."

Just don't get me started on supermarket trolley attendants after Saturday afternoon...

This is really rather funny:

Takes me back to my first contact with the internet in a Royston flat with Colin Campbell does http://www.textfiles.com, I remember doing searches for Men in Black and Black Helicopters then ;-)